Charging patients for missed sessions

When Sigmund Freud originally developed psychoanalysis (the precursor to dynamic psychotherapy), he likened treatment fees to those for music lessons:

“As to time, I follow the principle of payment for a fixed hour exclusively. A given hour is assigned to each patient, and that hour is his and he is responsible for it even if he does not make use of it. This practice, which for the music or language instructor is considered normal in our society, when it involves a physician sometimes appears harsh or unworthy of his role…”

Nowadays, similar missed-appointment penalties exist in dentist offices, hair salons, and many restaurants, hotels, and spas that require reservations. The rationale in all these settings is that another patient, client, or customer cannot immediately fill the place of a no-show. The time and resources of the doctor or business have been wasted.

Freud’s successors have modified and refined this policy in differing ways. At one extreme are analysts who charge for any missed session, planned or unplanned, regardless of reason. The analyst announces his or her vacation dates and holidays well in advance, and patients can choose to plan their own accordingly. A more lenient if less clear-cut approach is to waive the fee if the therapist can fill the hour with another patient. More commonly, therapists waive fees for sessions cancelled with advance notice; the amount of required notice is specified beforehand and varies considerably among clinicians. The APA code of ethics cautiously endorses this approach:

“It is ethical for the psychiatrist to make a charge for a missed appointment when this falls within the terms of the specific contractual agreement with the patient. Charging for a missed appointment or for one not canceled 24 hours in advance need not, in itself, be considered unethical if a patient is fully advised that the physician will make such a charge. The practice, however, should be resorted to infrequently and always with the utmost consideration for the patient and his or her circumstances.”

Under all three of these variations, the reason for the absence has no bearing on whether the fee is charged, although obviously it can be discussed and explored in the therapy itself. Conversely, some therapists are less concerned about advance notice, and will forgive even uncanceled no-shows if a compelling reason is offered. Since many psychiatrists and other therapists have policies that differ from the APA ethical standard and from each other, it is fair to say there is no consensus in the field about these policies. Here are my reflections on this morass.

There is a certain cold logic to the draconian standard of never waiving the fee for any reason. Aside from any selfish motive to maximize the analyst’s income, this policy provides the most consistent “therapeutic frame,” in that subjective judgments of the analyst never enter the picture. When analysands (patients) fall ill or are forced to remain at work during their therapy hour, they may pay the fee with gratitude that the analyst is holding “their” hour, pay with some regret, or pay while bitterly railing against the autocratic, unfeeling analyst. However they react, it’s all transference.

Well, sort of. For analytic theory also recognizes the “real relationship” (coined by analyst Ralph Greenson in 1967, I believe), which takes into account the realism and genuineness of two people engaged in analytic or psychotherapeutic work. Many would argue that never waiving fees, regardless of circumstance or even months of advance notice, is not very realistic for the world we live in. That is my view, too.

The next contender, to waive the fee if the therapist can fill the hour with another patient, is apparently not uncommon among psychoanalysts, although in my experience it rarely forms the policy of non-analysts. From the clinician’s perspective, this policy, too, guarantees that income will not be lost. However, in this case the outcome for the patient hinges on the analyst’s behavior, i.e., whether and to what extent the analyst attempts to fill the hour. Since the reality of these efforts, and therefore the actual likelihood the fee will be waived, are unknown to the patient, this approach also invites a wide variety of transferential fantasies: That the analyst strives tirelessly to fill the hour, or couldn’t care less; has no other patients, or has a long, eager waiting list; is meticulously honest, or charges the fee regardless of actually filling the hour; and so forth. These reactions can usefully shed light on the patient’s dynamics, moving the treatment forward.

The problem with this policy is that it trades away part of the therapeutic frame. Yes, potentially illuminating transference arises. But it would as well if the analyst unilaterally changed other aspects of the frame, such as the length or frequency of the sessions. Psychoanalysts and dynamic therapists know not to do this; consistency provides the container that allows emotional vulnerability (and therapeutic regression) to occur. Likewise, waiving the fee for a canceled session should not depend on how busy, diligent, honest, or popular the analyst is. If it happens at all, it should depend on patient factors, not analyst factors.

The most typical policy in dynamic psychotherapy is for the therapist to announce at the start of treatment how much advance notice is required to avoid being charged for a cancelled appointment. This can range from the 24 hours suggested in the APA code, to two weeks or longer. In my experience, it is most often one or two business days, although some therapists require notice by the previous session, often a week earlier.

This policy enjoys the therapeutic-frame advantages of consistency: The patient knows, based on his or her own behavior, whether a fee will be charged. This is analogous to knowing that therapy starts and stops on time, that if one is X minutes late, there are Y minutes left for therapy that day. The disadvantages are that cancelled sessions may result in lost income for the therapist, and that no distinction is made between frivolous cancellations (where the fee is still waived if announced well in advance), and dire emergencies (where the fee is charged, since such absences are generally unanticipated). Of course, therapists can break their own rules and refuse to waive the fee for a frivolous cancellation, or to waive it for a sudden emergency. The advantages of consistency are lost — traded away, in effect, for the “real relationship.” Nonetheless, this is probably the best approach overall for a problem with no perfect solution.

At the other extreme, a policy of deciding, on a case by case basis, whether to waive the fee depending on the reason for the absence, is fraught with peril. This strategy pits the therapist’s values against the patient’s, establishes a dynamic of judging the patient, and, in effect, metes out punishment when the patient’s rationale is “not good enough.” I can find little to recommend it.

How about having no policy at all? With each canceled or missed session, the therapist and patient could discuss whether the fee will be charged. I find it curious that I have never heard this idea even contemplated. It could mire the treatment in endless discussion about “the shape of the table” (a Vietnam-era reference to talking about the setting instead of the topic at hand). But that is what dynamic therapy is largely about anyway. It might not provide a sufficient therapeutic frame; it might be too anxiety-provoking for both parties. On the other hand, it would underscore the collaborative, co-constructed nature of therapy.

My own policy is to waive fees for sessions canceled at least a day in advance. I rarely if ever break my own policy. It is not particularly onerous, and patients seem to understand that I could not realistically fill a suddenly vacated hour, even if canceled for good cause. When patients cancel sessions only a few days in advance, I sometimes fill the hour and sometimes cannot, but I consider that my problem, not the patient’s. I feel this policy works fairly well for everyone involved. However, it isn’t perfect, as illustrated by this last case:

A patient recently called on the morning of her appointment to report a bad cold. She was willing to come to her appointment that day; however, she wondered if I might prefer to see her later that week when she would be less contagious. It was an interesting twist on the typical same-day cancellation. In truth, I did prefer to delay her visit. I had a suitable free hour later in the week, and didn’t want to catch her cold. By allowing me to decide, and since it worked to our mutual benefit, I obviously would not charge her for missing that day. We met at the rescheduled time, and all was well. Yet I confess to a nagging uncertainty: By solving this problem for both of us, i.e., agreeing to reschedule her at no charge, did I make a decision that really was hers? Assuming she is in insight-oriented dynamic therapy, would it have been better therapeutically for her to decide between (1) attending her hour while ill, and possibly sickening me, or (2) paying for a missed hour? I leave this as an exercise for the reader.

135 comments to Charging patients for missed sessions

  • Anon

    (1.) What is your policy on the patient paying you if they go on a planned vacation with plenty of notice?

    (2.) Do you expect the patient to pay you for their regular session time when you go on vacation?

  • Ms. Sharkey

    After reading all these comments and responses, I am even more appreciative than usual of my therapist’s sensible and respectful cancellation policies. As long as I cancel with more than 24 hours notice, I am not charged for appointments I do not attend. I do not pay my therapist when he is on vacation. He does not expect me to pay when I am on vacation. Nor does he expect me to schedule my vacations to coincide with his. I am appalled that there are therapists who think that last stipulation is in any way reasonable.

    You keep insisting that other service providers have cancellation policies and therefore therapists should too, but you consistently conflate “no show” appointments with “cancelled in advance” appointments. If I don’t show up for a scheduled appointment with a service provider, then I should be charged for it. If I notify the service provider in advance that I will be away on vacation, business etc., then I do not expect to be charged. I would stop working with any service provider that expected that of me.

    I reject the idea that therapists are allowed to charge for services not rendered because it holds the therapeutic frame and the therapy relationship is so very unique. Nor am I swayed by the argument that I need to guarantee the therapist’s financial stability. A responsible therapist realizes that clients have a life outside the office that involves vacations, business trips and other work obligations, family obligations etc. A responsible therapist realizes there will be inevitable cancellations and budgets accordingly.

    I am very appreciative that my therapist treats me like the fully-rounded adult that I am and respects that I have a full and busy life outside the therapy room.

    • Thanks for your comment. I’ll take as a compliment, as my own cancellation policy matches your therapist’s. I agree with you that this type of policy feels respectful to both parties. Personally, I rarely have any problem in its application.

      Yet you sound peeved that I “insist” there are rationales to alternative cancellation policies. Of course, I’m just stating a fact, I’m not endorsing these policies. Freud based his cancellation policy on music lessons: at least in his day, a student paid the music instructor whether or not the lesson was attended. Advance cancellation didn’t waive the fee. We can argue all day over whether this is fair, or unreasonable on the part of music teachers, serves a justifiable purpose, or whatever. The bottom line is, every psychotherapy cancellation policy has precedents in cancellation policies from other fields. It’s important for therapists (and music teachers) to state clearly such policies up front, not to change them unilaterally mid-stream, and to apply them without prejudice. Beyond that, it’s up to the client or patient to decide whether to obtain services under the stated policy. I’m glad yours works for you — and for my own patients.

  • Ms. Sharkey

    Am I the only one who finds it downright odd that we’re discussing the merits of basing current business practices on what music teachers in Austria did over a century ago? Frankly, I think their stance was unethical, bad business practice and bad customer retention practice. I think that holds trues for anyone who adopts a similar stance today.

    And you do keep contradicting yourself. An earlier poster commented that her therapist has a flexible cancellation policy and you replied that such a policy is not in the patient’s best interests. Even though you yourself have what sounds like a similarly flexible policy. So are your policies not in the best interest of your patients?

    I have ongoing relationships and appointments with many service providers, including a massage therapist, psychotherapist, chiropractor and hair stylist. If I have to miss an appointment due to work or vacation, my chiro/stylist/RMT do not charge me. I pay them only when I come into their office and use their services. To use another example, I take pre-paid classes at a local gym. If I miss a class due to last-minute work issues or illness, I forfeit that class. If I know in advance that I will be away, I have the option (and I always take it) of scheduling a make-up class.

    In short, no other business that I am aware of penalizes clients for going on vacation or business trips.

    • Even today many businesses do not forgive cancellations “known in advance.” Many airline tickets are completely non-refundable. If I sign up for a lecture series I pay for the whole series whether I go or not. Same for season tickets at the symphony or ballpark, and for classes at my local community college. It wouldn’t surprise me if some music or language teachers still charge as they did in Austria over a century ago.

      You pay rent or mortgage whether you’re home or not, even while on a long vacation or business trip. Same for your internet provider and cable tv. Lawyers on retainer, concierge medical practices…

      Life’s too short to get worked up over this. If it irritates you to pay for a service you might not use, then be happy you found service providers with a different policy. As you note, there are plenty who operate more to your liking.

  • Ms. Sharkey

    If life is too short to get worked up over this, then why did you write a blog post about it?

    And many of your examples do not hold up. Airline are non-refundable only if you choose not to buy cancellation insurance. If have sport or symphony subscriptions and will have to miss an event, I can recoup my loss by selling the ticket or choose to gift someone the ticket. The key being that it’s my choice. If I’m signed up for classes and know I’ll miss one, I can ask to borrow notes from a fellow student.

    Your rent/mortgage analogy is particularly flawed. My house stores my belongings while I’m away on vacation.

    I do not agree that it’s unreasonable to get “worked up” over being subjected to unethical business practices. My reasoning is influenced by the fact that I am a consultant. I charge and get paid for only the hours that I work. If I take a day off, I lose a day’s pay. I knew that before I accepted my first consulting job and I manage my finances accordingly. I expect service providers I work with to do the same.

    • I wrote the post to discuss all the ways psychotherapists think about this issue. Not to say there’s one right way and everyone else is an unethical fool.

      As I outlined, there’s quite a range of policies. You write as though 24 hours notice is the only “sensible and respectful” option. But why not 48 hours, or 12 for that matter? Or only pay if you actually show up, and not if you decide to skip it at the last moment? The 24 hour figure is entirely arbitrary. I happen to like that policy myself, but there’s nothing sacred about it.

      You seem most focused on therapy policies with no cancellation options at all. As I wrote in my original post, I find these too draconian. I feel they ignore life’s realities. However, I wouldn’t call them unethical… unless nonrefundable airline tickets and prepaid college classes are unethical too.

      You said you were unaware of any other business that penalizes clients for going on vacation or business trips. I gave you nearly ten examples. Your workarounds — cancellation insurance, reselling your tickets, etc. — don’t change their no-refund policies. If you can borrow notes to make up for a missed class, you can equally read a self-help book or engage in self-reflection to make up for a missed therapy session. (Not that I think this is a real substitute in either case.) I stand by what I wrote earlier: no-cancellation policies exist across many service industries. Caveat emptor.

    • Dr. A.

      What would you do if, as a consultant you were hired for work, but the client cancelled same day?

  • Anonymous

    Thanks for this post. I am seeing a psychiatrist in Toronto, Canada and am frustrated with the ambiguous cancellation policy. I feel I am left with the responsibility to ask the appropriate questions to understand her policy. I’ve brought this up with my psychiatrist: that I find the inflexible cancellation policy frustrating, but she doesn’t budge. I’m at my wits end. What is your suggestion at this point? Keep negotiating, or end the relationship?

    I am tapering my antidepressants with her currently. I am cognizant of the fact that I want this done under her authority; but I sense that she is being very conservative about seeing me weekly.

    Looking for an objective opinion.

    • I’m a little confused. Is your psychiatrist’s policy “ambiguous” i.e., unclear, ill-defined? Or is it clear but “inflexible”? If the former, I suggest you try at least once more to talk to her about how the lack of clarity regarding this “treatment frame” issue is making you uncomfortable. Maybe she’ll be more clear. If the latter — if you disagree with her clearly-stated policy — then you’ll likely frustrate yourself in a continued attempt to make her “budge.” You may be happier with a doctor who has a more agreeable cancellation policy. Take care.

  • Sydney

    I know this is an older post but I’m curious to know whether or not you think my doctor’s policy (which he just sort of threw at me in the middle of a session after a year of seeing him weekly) is ethical. After two cancellations within 12 months, regardless of how much notice you give him (days, weeks, months,) I am responsible for the full amount of the session. I have a standing weekly morning appointment, which is difficult to come by, but I also have three children. Knowing that I am not able to get out of more than two a year without paying $300 (insurance does not cover missed sessions) is very stressful!

    • Hi Sydney,

      In my opinion, your doctor’s policy would be ethical if presented at the start. While it’s not a policy I’d use myself, it falls well within the broad range of cancellation policies that are considered acceptable in this field. Knowing about it beforehand, you could make an informed decision about whether to work with that therapist and his policies.

      Introducing it as a new restriction after a year is the questionable part. The onus is then on the therapist to justify changing the “frame” midstream. Any such change puts the patient in a difficult position: whether to abandon the “sunk costs,” i.e., time and money already invested, in the face of a new policy that feels unacceptable. A patient can reasonably protest that he or she would not have started therapy in the first place under this new policy, and that operating under the new rule is very stressful.

      In my view, it is unethical to institute a more restrictive (or expensive) policy without cause midway through a treatment. But sometimes there are rationales to justify it. For example, I invite my patients to call me after-hours if needed in a crisis. Most patients never do. However, rarely a patient abuses this privilege and starts calling repeatedly, e.g., several times a night, night after night. I then invoke a “new policy” that my after-hours line is no longer freely available to them. Despite the potential harm and “unfairness” of introducing this new policy in an ongoing treatment, I feel I can justify it: after-hours access was never intended to be used that way.

      Adding more restriction to a cancellation policy could similarly be justified if a patient pushed the existing rules to limits the therapist didn’t anticipate. I can imagine this happening in my own practice, for example, if someone canceled one day in advance, i.e., without charge, several times in a row. As in the crisis call example, I’d feel my permissive policy was being exploited, and that my cancellation policy was never intended to be used that way. Ideally, this is a discussion I would have with my patient, and not simply my surprise imposition of a new policy.

      From the therapist’s perspective, this illustrates the subtlety of balancing humanistic leniency and hard-edged limit setting. Swing too far to the former, and one’s own misgivings will lead to “unfair” mid-course corrections (or simmering resentment, which may be worse). Swing too far to the latter, and one’s treatment will lack human connection and warmth. It’s not possible even in theory to anticipate how a therapy will unfold, so the treatment frame is always an approximation, in dynamic tension between these two poles.

  • Yvonne

    What do you do for patients who have very unique situations? I had been seeing my therapist for four years when my child was suddenly diagnosed with an extremely rare (1/1,000,000) brain disease and we had to travel to Boston Childrens Hospital within two weeks after diagnosis for neurosurgery. That was almost a year ago. At first my therapist was very understanding and flexible, but our relationship became increasingly difficult over time. I did my best to keep our regularly scheduled appts and not schedule appts for my daughter during that time, but sometimes I had no choice. She also suffered frequent severe headaches post op and I would have to cxl bc I did not feel comfortable leaving her home with my teenage son when there was a chance she might have a TIA or stroke. He became increasingly less willing to be flexible and more annoyed with time if I was late due to making sure things were ok at home before I could leave. Our relationship completely fell apart a few weeks ago and he said he could no longer see me. This was a few weeks before we were scheduled to go back to Boston to go through multiply tests to see if her surgery had even worked and nothing has progressed, so a very stressful time to offload a patient. I started seeing him bc I had early onset Parkinsons and depression. The depression worsened over the years and untreated I was suicidal and self harming. So how flexible with scheduling would you be if presented with this type of unique uncontrollable situation? How would you work things out?

    • Yvonne,

      You describe a hard situation, and I have no easy answer. Your therapist was more understanding and flexible at the beginning of your crisis, which was the right thing to do in my opinion. However, eventually, over weeks or months, a crisis like yours becomes your new status quo, and your treatment relationship has to be renegotiated. Neither you nor your therapist could anticipate your daughter’s diagnosis and how your life would change so radically. It isn’t fair to you or your therapist to hold to a prior arrangement which no longer applies.

      I believe there’s a role for customized or ad-hoc therapy arrangements in special cases. These must be pursued with special care, as making exceptions and bending rules may unwittingly harm the patient through ethical and clinical miscalculation. To take an example similar to your situation, I’ve had patients whose ongoing work travel prevented regularly scheduled therapy sessions. Instead of refusing to see these patients at all, I agreed to meet with them on an ad-hoc basis, as their schedules allowed. As an ethical matter, I felt it was important to share with them my belief that a consistent therapy relationship is more effective and helpful — even if with someone else, not me. Ad-hoc therapy, I shared, is not nearly as good in my view, but better than nothing. (This kind of situation, and rationale, also suggests online therapy, where consistent accessibility may outweigh the potential drawbacks.)

      Ultimately it boils down to what both parties can live with, and what is apt to be helpful. Some therapists refuse to schedule sessions haphazardly due to a patient’s work travel, others happily do so without a care. As mentioned, I’m in between. Frequent lateness can be a deal-breaker for some therapists, a minor issue at most to others. Therapists are trying to make a living, and a consistent schedule certainly helps with that. But there are also good clinical reasons to insist on a consistent “treatment frame” — and sometimes good reasons to flex the rules. Balancing these is difficult, or should be, for any thoughtful therapist. Take care.

  • anonymous

    I’m really confused by my psychiatrist’s (who I also see for psychodynamic therapy) cancellation methodology. I’ve been seeing her for 4 years and really trust her so feel like there must be some logic based in psychiatric principles but I’m trying to figure it out and can’t. In short the strategy seems to be to cancel appointments if patients are in crisis?

    To begin with she schedules a bit untraditional – doesn’t see the same patients at the same time each week. This actually works great for me as my own on-call schedule at the hospital is inconsistent. I have only once ever canceled an appointment (with around 48 hours notice) and that was because I was stuck in the hospital with complications from a surgery (mine, not a patient’s).

    She has voicemail that she checks throughout the business day and a cell phone for 24/7 urgent situations. I have never called her cell phone. Only once in 4 years did I call her office voicemail (because of an ADR from a new rx). She has actually gotten frustrated in the past that I haven’t called her more often during crisis-type situations.

    Here’s where I’m really confused… I’ve been having the worse couple of weeks of my life and after a lot of contemplation I finally got up the nerve to call her office voicemail last Tuesday for any suggestions. (I had seen her on the Friday the few days before and my next appointment was the Monday a week later.) She called back a few hours later saying she was sorry that was happening but as a result would need to cancel my Monday appointment and push it back by another 4 days. I guess I was overstepping some boundary for calling in between appointments (even though in the past I had been criticized for not doing so enough) and the consequence was that I would have to wait even longer to get help? I trust that there is some reason to her methodology but I don’t understand what it is and really don’t feel like I can wait that long without understanding the reasoning.

    • Ok, you stumped me. Or your psychiatrist has. I even slept on it overnight, and still can’t think of any plausible reason to push a patient’s appointment back because of a crisis call. The only rationale I can think of, and it doesn’t sound very plausible, is if she believes you’re overly dependent, and wants to enforce a minimum number of days between contacts to discourage the dependency. Another long shot, which isn’t a good rationale at all in my opinion, is that she’s so busy that your call “counts as a visit” in her mind, because she doesn’t have the time to take all her calls and see all her patients.

      I’m really reaching here. The short answer is, I don’t know. I certainly hope you ask her the next time you talk.

  • gianna

    The long and short of it for me is this: life is too complicated and uncertain to enforce a punitive cancellation policy unless, over time, the cancellations are unreasonable, excessive, or frivolous. Otherwise,the collateral damage outweighs the benefits of the relationship from any frame. There are businesses that do not charge for a cancelled appointment; in fact, there are businesses where appointments are regularly renegotiated. Think about your banker. Does your bank charge you if you have to reschedule an appointment to discuss a loan or anything for that matter. (I’d find a new hairdresser or manicurist who charged if I had to reschedule.) Do the courts charge if a trial necessitates rescheduling? I have never had a physician offer to pay me when he needed to reschedule my appointment, even those who have strict cancellation policies. I’ve often thought of pointing this out. I don’t live in a world where people are gifted with the ability to foretell the future – and personally, it would be funny if it weren’t so damaging, to enact cancellation policies -and adhered to such a policy. These policies paint the relationship as employer / employee rather than DR / patient. The inherent problems of cancellation cannot be solved by dictating whether or not someone can be ill or have other extenuating circumstances that necessitate cancelling an appointment without being punished. Cancellation policies are punitive, beneficial only to the provider and unproductive. There is no “good reason” for them except to benefit the provider – the reason they cause such a bad taste in the patients mouth. the argument other patients are being cheated out of an appointment is ridiculous. We all play each role from time to time – such is life.

    • Billy

      I think your post perhaps inadvertently draws attention to a glossed over aspect of this issue. The charging automatically policy takes advantage of an inequity in the situation, to benefit the therapist, when there is no such option for the client. When my therapist cancels last minute, as may happen because she has a life where weather can be confining, people close are mortal, illnesses come on suddenly etc., she can reschedule. I don’t have the option to enforce that with her when I cancel. If a client clearly has a history of honour around money matters, the therapist would do well to learn from that rather than not grow out of his/her own dishonourable behaviour. If a therapist is worried that they’ll run aground with a policy of deciding on a case by case basis, God help the rest of the clients’ therapy.

    • I freely admit that one purpose of charging for late cancellations and no-shows is the disincentive. Only yesterday I had one patient cancel her appointment for tomorrow because she’d agreed to walk someone’s dog at that time. Another failed to show yesterday because she had the time wrong (we don’t have a regular hour yet). Another patient misses more appointments than he makes, often apologetically calling me the day of the session. What do these patients have in common? I see them under Medicare and can’t charge for these missed visits.

      This has been my experience in 20 years of private practice: on the whole, free services aren’t valued as much. This applies not only to the actual psychotherapy sessions, but to my availability as well. Patients who know they’re responsible for the fee don’t schedule dog-walking during their therapy time; they carefully note when to come to appointments; they don’t repeatedly cancel at the last minute. Punitive is one word for it; another is responsibility.

      Yes, this is a broad brush. There are extremely responsible Medicare patients, and very lackadaisical self-pay patients. But on the whole this has been my experience. Please note that having patients come to therapy consistently is a clinical matter as well as a business consideration. It’s good for both of us.

      Are such policies asymmetrical because patients can’t charge therapists for similar lapses? Of course. Aside from any therapeutic considerations, cancellation policies serve the business owners who create them. Your airline ticket is nonrefundable by policy if you don’t show; the airline may pay you for their lapse, but it’s not guaranteed by any policy. As I’ve repeatedly commented here, various types of businesses differ widely in how they handle this. For every bank loan officer who doesn’t charge, there’s a dentist who does. And, please, courts? You’re charged with a crime — contempt of court — if you fail to show.

      Service providers, especially highly trained professionals, have a reputation to uphold. We are at the mercy of market forces. It is in our own interest not to miss our own appointments. My own late cancellations or no-shows, over decades of practice and untold thousands of appointments, can be counted on one hand. Ok, maybe two. My cancellation policy doesn’t handle this extremely rare event, because it doesn’t have to. If any of you see psychotherapists who miss scheduled sessions on a regular basis, you have a much bigger problem on your hands than any cancellation policy, symmetrical or not, can handle.

      • Billy

        See, the thing is, this ‘business’ of yours, in its intense variety at least, is claimed to cure ‘by relationship’. I think the point gianna was raising was that the blanket charge-for-cancellation fails to take account of this relationship aspect. Sure there are patients who aren’t committed in any meaningful sense of the word, and perhaps a don’t-come-pay-anyway policy will have helpful effects. But when a patient is committed, the policy sends a clear message that the money is more important than the therapy or the relationship should the need for last minute cancellation arise, as inevitably it will in time. The therapist is saying ‘I need my supplies no matter what’. Who needs therapy then?

        • Therapy is a business. Pretending it’s not serves no one. The patient’s fantasy that it’s not — that it’s a friendship, or a form of unconditional parental love — is where many therapies go awry. Patients then suffer excessively when the inevitable business nature can’t be avoided: the therapist takes a vacation, retires, or simply has a private life that patients aren’t privy to. It’s no coincidence that traditional psychoanalysis, the most “intense” therapy, the one that most lays claim to “cure by relationship,” also has the strictest cancellation policies.

          The money isn’t more important than the therapy. Like the therapist’s office and chairs, it’s one of the things that makes the therapy possible in the first place. This still leaves lots of leeway for therapists to have different cancellation policies, just as other businesses do.

  • Billy

    I’m not sure whether you missed the point, or if we merely have different value systems. Therapy is a business but it’s not real estate or a supermarket. If you think that treating all patients equally with a cancellation policy is fine, then your brand of therapy at bottom is one person purchasing so-called expertise from another. Patients might as well skip the ripoff and read a textbook because obviously the relationship with such a therapist is fiscal at the heart and so cannot possibly help in any real way, despite what you claim. Your idea that the only conceptual and practical options are pathological fantasies of ‘friendship’ or loco in parentis, or a furnished therapy shop clues us in to why your cancellation policy idea is what it is.

    • I get your point, I simply disagree with it. Yes, my “brand” of therapy is one person purchasing expertise from another — no “so-called” about it. If it were not, there would be no need for therapists to be trained, and we’d offer no benefit over talking with a friend. Yet it’s nothing like reading a textbook: the training is all about seeing patients as individuals. Where you and I most fundamentally disagree is that I hold most aspects of the treatment frame constant across these individuals. I see everyone for 50 minutes, I treat everyone with equal respect and attention, I hold everyone equally responsible for the fee. You equate this with “just take a number” at the supermarket. In contrast, I see it as the best way to avoid countertransference enactments, and to let the patient’s inherent personality come to light. The “making a living” part is there too, but it’s not the first thing on my mind.

      All legitimate psychotherapy is “fiscal at the heart” according to your definition. A few therapists, usually with lesser training, believe that concealing the business aspects of the relationship is more humanistic or healing or personal. They try to be a friend. In my opinion they are fooling themselves and their patients with a relationship based on denial. Of course, they would disagree with me, just as you do. That’s ok.

      • Billy

        Yes, I’m content to disagree. There’s a seriously outstanding irony in your rationalisation, whereby on the one hand you say that you’re so much better than a textbook because you see people as individuals, and on the other hand that everyone is the same when it comes to a cancellation policy. That you have your policy to avoid countertransference enactments is itself an enactment you don’t appear to be privy to.

  • user

    my therapist charges for all missed sessions regardless of how long in advance I’ve told here i’m going away, i find this extremely unfair and am thinking of switching.

  • User

    I’m sorry but I completely disagree with this blog. It is one thing to charge a fee of up to $50.00 for a missed appointment but to charge the entire fee that is normally charged for a session show that the provider only cares about money.

    There are MANY professionals – doctors, attorneys, CPAs that don’t charge fees when their clients just don’t show up. I don’t think their time is any less valuable than that of a therapist as they are service industries and make money selling their time. This practice in psychotherapy/psychiatry just shows that it’s all about the money and nothing else.

  • Anonymous

    I am a therapist and have a question sort of related to this. What about patients who arrive late or have to leave the session early? Do you still bill the insurance for the entire session that they were scheduled for? For example: Client is scheduled for a 1 hour session, but arrive 15 min. late. Do you bill for a 45 min session or 60 min?

    • That’s a good question, as it balances again on the question of whose time is worth money, and who gets to set the price. According to insurance companies, or public insurance such as Medicare, a doctor/therapist should only submit claims for actual face-to-face time. You would bill for 45 minutes even though you set aside 60. Likewise, no insurance (as far as I know) pays for no-shows, as there is no face-to-face time at all. If the therapist is “in network” with that insurance plan, there is no recourse. In essence, the therapist has agreed to play by the insurer’s rules in order to see that insurance plan’s subscribers. In contrast, an out-of-network therapist can bill the patient for the full session previously agreed upon, or even for a no-show, and it is the patient who bears the financial brunt of reserving the therapist’s time and not using it.

      I imagine some therapists submit claims for full sessions even when patients arrive late or leave early — or even if they fail to show at all. But this is plainly insurance fraud if the therapist has signed a contract agreeing not to do that. Thanks for writing.

  • Anonymous psychotherapist

    I would like to put forward a perspective which suggests that charging for missed sessions, even if notice is given, can be difficult for the therapist but of great benefit for the patient.
    Most people would agree that it is the relationship that heals and that the therapist needs to be affected by the patient in order to be of any meaningful assistance.
    One could say that the therapist needs to take something of the patients illness into him or herself where it is worked upon and digested until something of it can be handed back to the patient in a form that they are able to manage.
    Ultimately this digestion process itself is something that is able to be taken in by the patient and then they can be free to leave therapy and process their own internal material.
    When thought about in this way then a missed session or a holiday taken by a patient does not necessarily mean that the therapist is working any less hard, it may in fact mean that more pressure has been put on him or her.
    There is also a limit to the number of patients that this kind of therapist can work with at any time, I am talking here of a psychic limit, where there is only space to be affected by a certain number of patients at any one time.
    Also much time is spent reflecting on these patients, dreaming about them, taking them to supervision etc none of this time is charged for specifically. One pays a fee to be engaged in a process and the process happens irrespective of the number of sessions which are missed.
    The patient’s fantasy can be that if one is not at the session then one is not affecting the therapist / inside them, therefore one shouldn’t pay. By agreeing to this surely the therapist is then in collusion with this fantasy. This would then make it harder for the patient to introject a dependably good and available object.
    An other important benefit of charging for missed sessions would be that it can bring up a great deal of negative transference! Which when worked through can be of tremendous benefit. I think that most therapists who take this perspective would agree that it would be easier to give the patient what they want – i e not to charge them for all missed sessions but this would mean that great opportunities have been lost.

  • Shains

    When you go to a therapy you expect a certain trust relationship with your therapist. A therapist has every right to enforce a policy but in doing so can destroy the long term relationship with that patient. I had started going to a therapist who seemed nice but when I had called in advance the night before and sent an email she insisted on adhering to policy because I had given her 12 hours notice instead of a full 24. This was my first missed appointment that I had missed and my others I was punctual and on time. Because she didn’t show me compassion this one time I don’t want to continue. For the first missed appointment I’ve been fortunate to have people who’ve let it slide or instead say pay half which I think is fair. Yes they are losing money from that appointment but they could have made 10000% more if they let the first missed appointment slide as people are human and sometimes accidents and forgetfulness happens especially if the appointment was booked more than a month in advance.

  • The last two commenters stake out opposing viewpoints very well. On the one hand “Anonymous psychotherapist” sees therapy as an unfolding process, not merely a series of disconnected sessions. The relationship exists whether a particular meeting takes place or not. Also, there is an expectation of negative transference, i.e., anger. Rather than attempting to appease or please, the therapist holds to a clear line so that both parties can see how the client/patient deals with it.

    However, this often won’t be successful, as “Shains” illustrates. Being consistent, even with a previously stated policy, “can destroy the long term relationship with [a] patient.” Therapists who “seem nice,” “show compassion,” and “let it slide” will be favored by many clients/patients. The argument that charging for canceled sessions is penny wise and pound foolish may certainly be correct: any therapist who has such a policy on economic grounds should probably rethink it.

    These arguments talk past one another in a very unfortunate way. Because I identify with the dynamic/analytic school myself, I’m sympathetic to “Anonymous psychotherapist’s” points. But a great many clients or patients aren’t on the same page. They seek emotional support, someone who will see things from their perspective, an ally. Unless they explicitly seek or agree to an analytic treatment, they are apt to experience the therapist as cold and withholding. I believe there’s great value in such treatment, where (as in real life, and as the Rolling Stones said so well) “you can’t always get what you want.” In my opinion, there’s a great waste of opportunity when my dynamic/analytic colleagues fail to explain the process, leaving clients/patients to assume the treatment frame is merely a moneymaking ploy. Of course, an informed client/patient may opt for a gratifying, pleasing therapist instead — such therapists are the norm, not the exception — whether or not we think it best.

  • Dr. Reidbord,
    Thank you for this great discussion. As a psychodynamic therapist I appreciate the complex issues involved in setting
    my fee, and other policies. I find the policies and fees which work best are those discussed at the beginning of treatment and revisited when needed. I have recently had to remind several clients of my cancellation fee, which is full fee when 24 hour notice is not given. It sparks conversation about needs, expectations, unreasonable demands in relationships etc. It becomes part of the treatment.
    The comment by anonymous about the crisis and having to wait for a later appointment time sounds like a policy of a DBT model. Not one I adhere to, but I have heard of it being done.

  • Yes, I was going to say the same about the DBT thing. The classic DBT intervention is…if client calls therapist AFTER engaging in target behavior (self-harming, etc), therapist is consequently inaccessible to client for a pre-discussed amount of time. The intent is to avoid reinforcing this behavior, which for many DBT clients is key as many display traits which would be coded on Axis II. However, if I were utilizing such a strategy with a client, I would of course make sure that they were fully aware of the policy, and the reasoning behind it, in advance.

    NB – I’m not speculating about the diagnosis of the previous commenter; simply responding to the situation he or she describes.

  • Jonathan

    I don’t think it makes sense to compare therapists to other types of services. Therapists generally hold a set time for patients on an ongoing basis. This means this time is reserved for them alone, and except in unusual circumstances, will not be used for other patients. Other patients cannot be taken on at this time for this reason. From the patients perspective, there can be great comfort in knowing that this time is reserved for them. If for any reason they don’t come it should be their decision. If they pay for the time regardless there is no guilt or question whether the absence was justified or warranted, and this should not be the therapists decision, but it also is not logical to expect a time slot be held for an individual if the therapist isn’t also being taken care of. As an extreme example let’s assume a patient decides they want to vacation every other month for one month. They should be allowed to live there life as they please, and of course these things are fodder for sessions, but it does not make sense that therapist should only be paid every other month for a time slot which cannot be used effectively. You might argue that’ it’s the therapists decision to accept such a patient and of course it would be the patients decision to accept it as well. Perhaps a patient decides they want to go to the movies the next day rather than therapy. That’s their perogative, and again this can be brought into the treatment, but it shouldn’t fall on the therapist to approve absences. Paying takes this out of the equation in a manner of speaking.

    • Billy

      Jonathan, the justification you’ve put forward here – that a patient is reserving a time and place and should therefore be responsible for paying for it financially I’m sure seems entirely reasonable if one is on the side it suits. But factually, that time and place are only reserved should the therapist be available, and not as a certainty. So the justifications does not hold. It simply articulates the hypocrisy of the policy.

  • Nerolie

    This is a really interesting discussion! As a clinical psychologist in private practice now for over four years, but long-term within a government health area prior to this, I have struggled – and still struggle – with getting the cancellation policy “right” since starting private practice. I do find that there are some people who, without a financial consequence in place, will cancel repeatedly for what seems to be minor reasons while others who have cancelled for very good reason (e.g. sudden and serious family health crisis)will offer to pay the full fee. It does seem that the cancellation rate is higher amongst those who are essentially obtaining a service for “free”, ie. paid for by someone else. However, this group also often have more difficult and complex life circumstances. I do discuss the cancellation policy with every new client but I will listen to cancellation reasons and in the cases of things such as car accidents, rush trips to hospital, sick children, I generally don’t impose a fee. However, on the other hand, I do question whether it should be my responsibility to ‘carry’ the burden of others’ emergencies/health status – and my practice costs remain the same, even when someone else has an emergency. Nevertheless, I build in some tolerance for the unavoidable cancellations – BUT this way lies the path to overbooking your week so that you feel somewhat ‘overcooked’ when everyone shows up that week. Then on another hand (can I have three hands please?) I certainly don’t want unwell people coming to see me, as some have done in the past, because if I get sick, that can be a week off work and a whole slew of people needing rescheduling! So sometimes, in cases of potentially contagious illness, I am on board with a session being cancelled – so should I charge for that? I’ve decided not to. Nevertheless, it’s reality that I couldn’t support a situation of repeated cancellations within a block of therapy work (admittedly I tend to do shorter-term focussed work, rather than long-term psychotherapy. Most of my clients rarely cancel, but there are a very small group who seem to cancel often! My experience in public health was that for many therapy services, if clients cancelled 2 or 3 times early on, the offer of service was withdrawn and they were put back on the service waiting list – no such thing as a ‘no consequence-free cancellation even in public health! I’ve toyed with the idea of a stepped-fee cancellation policy, for anyone cancelling with less than 24hours notice, maybe: 25% of fee for a first cancel, 50% for a second, then 100% thereafter. I want to encourage clients to take responsibility for committing to therapy and attending their appointments. Also, it does not seem reasonable for the viability of my practice to be entirely at the mercy of the day-to-day life events of all my clients. I wonder if anyone on a wage or a salary would willingly tolerate showing up to work each day only to be suddenly told by their employer “oh, today we’ve decided you’ll just get 75% of your pay today, or 50% of your pay today”. Good grief, I think I need to get some therapy about my cancellation policy anxiety! I’ve talked to many colleagues about the cancellations issue and the struggle to find the right way forward seems to be widespread – maybe it’s just my peer network. I can’t speak for all therapists of course, and as I said I’m not speaking as a long-term classic psychotherapist, but I wonder whether clients are aware of how much time and consideration many of us give to trying to make the cancellation policy a fair and reasonable part of our therapeutic practice.

  • Denver Therapist

    I know this is an old thread but what strikes me most about the comments is the notion that a therapist’s cancellation policy is abhorrent if it is also about the therapist keeping a steady income. Why shouldn’t therapists make a decent income? As a therapist, I could not keep my “doors open” if I didn’t expect some level of steady income to pay my business expenses and myself an income. I take home less than 50% of each hour I bill — and then I pay taxes on that portion. So I am NOT getting rich. I need a baseline income to operate and serve my clients. Yes, cancellation policies have a clinical importance and they also have a financial importance to the therapists.

    There are some therapists who have spouses who are breadwinners so they do not have a need for steady income. I call them “hobby” therapists. Those therapists are often not that invested in their work as the therapist who MUST make a living from their practice. I work hard as hell to serve my clients because I need them too. I am not careless or lazy because my clients are my livelihood.

    Clients who can’t possibly understand that or see that as a rip-off may be independently wealthy and not work themselves. Can you image if you showed up for work, but your boss did not, so you didn’t get paid for that day? That would not be fair and people would be outraged. If you hire a therapist, plan to pay them for their time and plan on a cancellation policy.

  • Maggie

    This is a very interesting thread. I’m a psychotherapist. What I think is missing is consideration of the the time spent outside of the therapy hour, time we spend thinking about the client, preparing for work with them, going to supervision & talking about them. Clients don’t simply have 50 mins, they also are kept in mind outside this time… That time is put in whether or not they cancel the session.

  • Pat

    We have our clients read and sign our cancelation policy and file it in their record. It states, quite simply, “If you cancel your appt. less that 24 hours or fail to show up for your appt., you are charged the full rate”. We call as a courtesy two business days before their appt. and remind them of the date, day and time. If we have to leave a message we do so, stating the appt. day, date and time TWICE. We allow them to call 24/7 and leave us a message if they need to cancel as the messages are date and time stamped. We do everything to help them keep their appt. short of picking them up and delivering them. I think courtesy is important on both sides. The client also needs to show they are investing themselves in this therapy as well. I think some clients have the attitude that this is a hobby for their psycotherapists rather than a profession that pays their bills and puts food on the table for their families.

  • A Psychotherapist in San Francisco

    Many people in the comments have mentioned that their dentists, chiropractors, hairdressers, etc. do not charge for cancelations. I imagine this varies by location. In the major metropolitan area where I live, many of these service providers do charge for cancellations when given less than 24 hours notice.

    Additionally, the type of treatment therapists provide typically requires that the therapist take on far fewer clients than dentists, massage therapists, hairdressers, etc. Other service providers, such as dentists and hairdressers, often have hundreds of clients in their practice, and when a client cancels, the service provider can typically use the newly freed time to see another client. Because therapists usually see clients weekly, they must reserve space for each client every week. Many therapists see only the same 15-20 clients each week (with other hours reserved for paperwork and other business tasks). Even therapists who take on more clients at a time have only 40 hours in a work week at their disposal and can see no more than 35 clients. If a client cancels and the therapist does not charge, the therapist loses income that week. If the client cancels frequently, this can quickly become a significant financial burden on the therapist.

    I know of some therapists who solve this problem by simply referring out clients who cancel too frequently and retaining only clients who tend to show regularly for their appointments. I know of other therapists who take on more than 35 clients a week, but then do not guarantee that the client will always be able to get an appointment with the therapist each week.

    For me, I believe it is important to be available to my clients for at least one hour every week and to be occasionally available for crisis calls and emergency appointments.

    I have tried to strike a balance in my practice. I reserve a weekly time for clients. I take four weeks of vacation each year (two weeks in the winter, one week in the summer, and one week at some other time with notice given); clients are not charged when I am away. My clients are also given an additional four weeks out of each year that they can miss without being charged. I allow for reschedules and do not charge when clients reschedule. Beyond those four missed weeks in a year, I charge for any missed appointments.

    I encourage my clients to think of their therapy as equivalent to enrolling in a class. There are a limited number of spaces in a class. When you enroll, you expect to pay a set tuition and tuition is not reduced if you do not attend all of the classes. Occasional absences are to be expected—people get sick, have emergencies and go on vacations. But one should make space in their schedule in order to attend as much of the class as possible. If someone misses too frequently, they will find they get very little out of the class.

    It’s not a perfect policy. It’s onerous to explain and clients sometimes find it confusing. It is also bothersome to track clients’ cancellations and to have to remind them when they are “out” of “free absences”. It also increases reschedules which makes for a frequently changing weekly schedule for the therapist. But it does seem to reduce absences while also providing clients with some flexibility.

    On the client side of things, some clients find it to be “very generous” while others believe it is “very strict”.

  • A Psychotherapist in San Francisco

    Oops. I meant to say, above, that it’s important to me “to be available for occasional crisis calls and emergency appointments,” not to be “occasionally available” for crisis calls and emergency appointments. Big difference.

  • Boat

    I am not a therapist which is a good thing because I have a type AAA personality and my clients would leave in droves due to my black and white thinking. See not everyone can be a therapist. Not everyone can afford all of the extra years in school and resulting opportunity cost. Not everyone can put up with the stress. Therapists, doctors etc have a desired skill set that is either not obtainable or desired by everyone. They have families to raise and support. My opinion for what it is worth is that if the client wants respect from the doc, the client must also respect the doctors need to pay his bills and take care of family. The therapist should not feel too conflicted about setting the rules for cancellation, they earned the right to make choices for what’s best for their business and family. I think one should use some common sense and compassion as well but therapist and docs don’t deserve to be taken advantage of.

  • Boat

    Checked your fee schedule on you website. Very reasonable. Your prices are fair and you should expect some accountability from your patients.

  • Lynne Campbell

    This blog subject is extremely helpful for me as a therapist. I have a client, (or 5) who typically reschedule (most times) barely within the 24 hour policy limit. Most times, this session is not refillable by another client. I prepare for each client before their session and schedule them in accordance with their request to fit into their schedule. When the same client reschedules 5 appointments within 3 months,, it is frustrating. I am attempting to navagate this slippery slope. Keeping the relationship intact while at the same time attending to boundaries and limits is difficult at times. The depth of this subject gave much to think about moving forward.

    • Having a policy shouldn’t preclude exploration/discussion. A client who repeatedly cancels just before the 24 hour deadline is following the “letter of the law” but not the spirit. (And it really doesn’t matter what the policy is: nearly any policy can be pushed to its limits.) If you are frustrated by such behavior, it may be a good idea to raise it with the client — a frustrated therapist isn’t so great for them, either. Some people test limits all the time, others simply may not realize that it still matters to you if they cancel with “sufficient” notice. And this is before any possible exploration of cancellations due to emotional avoidance, angry acting-out, shame, and the like.

      You might also consider changing your policy to one that, if followed only barely, won’t frustrate you. Thanks for writing.

  • anonymous

    what if the therapist cancels twice, once within 3 hours of the appointment with an unwell reason. should you not be given the same courtesy.

  • Anonymous

    In Canada, we are paid by the government ( pt doesn’t pay, except via taxes). I have a written 48 hr cancellation policy that everyone is asked to sign. If they don’t sign, I won’t see them again. If they don’t come to their booked visit, I don’t get paid, so I bill them (according to our contract) . In unusual situations ( ER visit , child ill, major car accident), I will bend the rule, or cut a deal, I will take 1/2 the loss, and they will take 1/2 half the cost. They seem quite amenable to this negotiation.

    MD in Toronto, Canada

  • cptsd patient

    Im very grateful for the comments on this blog post. I am currently seeking long term open ended therapy for PTSD (specifically, cPTSD but also with isolated traumatic incidents- I am 23 and I havent had a single year that i havent dealt with some form of abuse).

    I personally have a history of ghosting on therapists. Ive been abused by at least two of them and usually now whenever there is any hint of any major confrontation or conflict, I flee. I am trying very hard not to do this with my current therapist but issues with cancellation policies are making me fearful and resentful.

    I will admit, I am the patient that has been discussed here as the “frequently absent” sort of patient. I try *very* hard to remember and attend appointments but somehow it keeps on happening. I am still troubleshooting this problem and trying different strategies such as setting alarms, etc. But it seems that every time my schedule shifts, it still happens. I get very frustrated at myself for this and very anxious about facing my therapist every time it happens. (I also have severe memory problems, so I dont think its as simple as me just not wanting to face therapy – although that definitely could be a factor)

    My therapist didnt tell me about her cancellation policies when I began meeting with her. I actually didnt even know that I would be charged when I missed an appointment – but i paid it regardless. I also am dealing with some serious financial insecurities right now due to being a student and engaging with a very capricious abusive family.

    I keep on missing appointments and I just cant simply keep paying this much money. If anything, the fear of getting charged is causing me to fall into a toxic cycle where I keep getting charged *more* by missing. Its making me distrust my therapist and making me want to quit therapy again. I know I will make this mistake with another therapist, if i choose to find one. This seems like a bad idea and a bad choice.

    I dont know what to do primarily because I clearly cant make this stop without some time and patience but I also cannot pay $100 every time I make another mistake because I just dont have that kind of money.

    I totally understand the need to hold the boundary so that a therapist can get paid, but reading all these perspectives on the internet about how patients like me are “the bane of a therapists existence” (an actual quote from another article!) is extremely triggering. It makes me wonder if my therapist is like that too – more concerned with the money than my well being.

    Im sorry if this is convoluted, Im still trying to formulate how to think of this and Im absolutely not trying to avoid accountability.
    Sorry if this seems convoluted

    • Thanks for writing. As discussed in the long thread of comments above, it’s very important for therapists to explain cancellation policies in advance. No patient should face an unanticipated fee.

      I’m sorry you read that patients like you are “the bane of a therapist’s existence.” Those are harsh words, although you seem to realize that missing appointments is a problem for both parties. It’s a dubious blessing of social media that everyone now freely airs their true feelings, no matter who gets hurt. (Back in the olden days, retailers and service providers mostly kept such opinions private. They didn’t necessarily like every client or customer, but they knew it was polite, and good for business, to exercise some discretion — and to be civil even when frustrated.)

      Therapists are working for a living, so the money does matter. There’s no getting around it. But that doesn’t mean they are “more” concerned about money than your well being. The money is what makes it possible to take an ongoing interest in your well being. This long thread reflects the complexity of mixing a professional relationship with real caring, and how there is no single best way to do this. Knowing that you tend to flee conflicts or major confrontations in therapy makes it all the more crucial to see your therapist and yourself on the same side, problem-solving together. How can you and your therapist deal with your absences, whether due to memory issues, not wanting to face her, or any other reason?

      If I may make a suggestion: think of your therapy cost as a fixed amount per week (or month), whether you go or not. If you were planning to spend this much anyway, missing doesn’t cost any extra. Don’t schedule extra or replacement sessions, because that increases the cost. This should ease some of the extra stress when you miss. cPTSD treatment is slow/gradual, and depends on developing trust in a consistent therapist and a consistent therapy. Missing (or attending) any one session isn’t critical, and making fees and policies less of a trigger should help. Do your best not to flee, talk about the urge with your therapist, and take care of yourself with her help.

  • Eliza

    Obviously an issue for me given my search online. I understand the many points raised above but somehow wish there could be accommodation for a holiday or two per year without covering missed appt. costs. Interestingly, I am now with a new (8 months) therapist who in many ways fits my needs now far differently than did my first. With the first, there was a 24hr cancellation policy. Once, I was a bit flaky and could not show up. I paid the fee and never did that again (though still got flaky sometimes, just > 24 hrs in advance). I can only surmise that those actions on my part created some degree of planning frustration on the part of the therapist. However, I also often frequently traveled for work. That therapist was not able to accommodate me in different appt times so I went without therapy. I provided ample notice for these absences and was not charged. New therapist, new job, and no cancellations permitted without charge. I do have children (who are fortunate to be able to travel to see grandparents or an occasional trip with us during school breaks) and find now that I sometimes have to choose between them and therapy. One option for me now will be to reduce to once weekly appts (only increased to twice with new therapist); another option would be to stop altogether. I recall having had knee surgery a few years back – no way I could have accessed current therapist’s office for a few weeks. Then, had another surgery later in the year that was more emotionally difficult and one medical complication. Guess I’d just have been out quite a bit of $ without in-person benefit. I am long-since physically healed now, but knowing that I could not have continued with current therapist’s approach had it existed with my first engenders feelings of unease (in her or the process, I am not sure). To reiterate, just would prefer SOME flexibility – even if only for hospitalization and a reasonable # of family time-off together.

    • Eliza

      Following up to the post from one year ago … decided to continue with the therapist (who, incidentally has a written policy) but now find myself frustrated by her ability to cancel appointments when needed (anywhere from 3 to 14 days in advance) whereas I still am not permitted to cancel without payment for ANY reason (surgery, illness, vacation, weather, work). I understand many of the explanations above but am just not sure I can fully accept this unwavering approach. If it is consistency and relationship building that is desired and that regular appointments help foster those characteristics, then why is it OK for the therapist to cancel at will? To be fair, when I have had a known conflict (typically alerted well in advance), she does try to find an alternate time. Unfortunately, those times typically result in a subsequent re-scheduling of on my part (right – a question of whose schedule matters more, I suppose) though I have usually accepted the option because I’d rather not pay for nothing. Virtual world has changed things somewhat, but I do find it odd (or unfair) that I am expected to call-in if on vacation whereas she is not, and I am also not allowed to take a break or have a conflict without penalty, whereas she is not.

  • Leeahjoy

    Hi, I have been seeing the same therapist for about 7 years and she charges a cancellation fee of the entire hour = 152.00 if I don’t cancel within 24 hours. I have paid this twice within that 7 year period, she has waived the fee once when there was a snow storm. I work as a child protection social worker and it is really hard sometimes to make this work and I really resent her charging me this fee, in fact, the one time she was able to fill my appt time but charged me anyways. I would think she would be able to write this off as a loss on her taxes? In all the years I have been seeing her I have only not cancelled within 24 hours 2 times. I just feel it’s unethical to charge this fee in fact this bothers me so much that I am thinking of leaving. I feel charging this fee should only be done if you are excessively cancelling, like if you cancel more than 2 times per year without a 24 hour notice then she could charge a fee but there are things that come up in life especially in child protection where I may have to miss an appt. This has made me feel like it’s all about the money and that she really doesn’t care about me as a person. She knows I am financially struggling and about to file bankruptcy and she still charges me. I think its a shaming process, “because you were bad I’m going to charge you 150.00 for being bad”…..I have lost a lot of respect in her for charging me. I do try to put myself in her shoes but after she charged me even when someone took that spot that’s when I felt it was sneeking……

  • Tom

    I’m a bit angry at my therapist. She is charging me $140 for an appointment “I missed.”

    I did not know about this appointment. She went on vacation and insists she told me the date of this upcoming appointment at our last session, but I distinctly remember her telling me that she’d e-mail the date of our next appointment. Of course, I’d have no problem paying had I missed the appointment and not called in advance. But I’m convinced that’s not the case.

    This has actually made me lose trust in her and want to seek out another therapist.

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